Raising Awareness About Abuse and Narcissism

There is a technique that I have learned from my counselor that has really helped me in overcoming my anxiety. I hope that it too, can help you. It is challenging but well worth it!

I am going to start be providing a few definitions of the way that anxiety sufferers think:

OVERGENERALIZATION: Any problem is made to look bigger than it really is. Words are used like "never, always, everybody". This makes an occassional occurance seem like an intolerable ongoing event. Basically, exaggerating which creates an anxious response.

BLAMING: Other people are doing bad things to you usually on purpose. By blaming, you are giving up the power to change a situation.

COMANDING: Using words like "should have got to" Having values is a healthy thing, but when they are raised to the level or moral dictates, problems with anxiety occur.

MAGNIFYING THE SITUATION: You turn a bad situation into the worst possible conclusion and continually set yourself up to relive this worst possible conclusion.

MISATTRIBUTIONS: Jumping to conclusions and mind reading.

These are the negative thoughts that anxiety sufferers experience, when going through a panic attack, or simply living with anxiety. The first exercise, is when you find yourself thinking this way, try to change these negative thoughts with positives ones!! Yep, it's difficult, and it will take you a while, but eventually you will right away, see and understand that negative thought and try to replace it. For example:
Lets use magnifying the situation. You are thinking "It's all over for me now. I'll never be able to show my face around here again!

Replace these negative thoughts with positive ones like: Yeah, this is frustrating but it's not the end of the world. or yes this is embarassing but tomorrow, everyone will forget!!!

Developing new positive coping thoughts will really help you in relieving your anxiety. I hope this works and next post I will move onto the next step.

These exercises really worked for me, and I can now deal with situations and events better than I ever could!

So through my counseling and groups, I have to come to find a very common ground between all of the women: We all suffer from anxiety! I developed anxiety at the beginning of my abusive relationship: Although I didn't know that it was anxiety, actually I didn't what it was at all and was sick of my doctor telling me I was a hypocondriac.

See, I would wake up at night nauseated and vomitting for what appeared to be no reason at all. During the day I would be shaky, my heart would pound, I had trouble breathing and would hyperventilate, I would feel dizzy and constantly tired. When I had a panck attack like this at work it got recognized as a symptom of anxiety. This was a shock to me.

I began to learn more and seeked help for it. I was never fully in control of my anxiety when I was with my abuser, but now, one year later I am anxiety free. I am still a worry bug - but I relate this to being a mom!!!

Being a victim of abuse has proufoundly affected me and it has changed me: But, for the better. Although I went through hell, and I am still going through difficult times I will be a stronger women and a better mom. It has made me who I am and created a passion to raise awareness of what abuse is and to reach out and try and offer a place for victims to talk and to feel comfortable: WE DESERVE THIS!!! and we shouldn't be embarassed and ashamed any longer.